


Not a ladies’ man

by Hypatia_66



Category: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (TV)
Genre: Episode Related, F/M, Gen, Het
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-11
Updated: 2018-08-11
Packaged: 2019-06-26 00:33:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15652119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hypatia_66/pseuds/Hypatia_66
Summary: After the Five Daughters AffairIllya has no idea of the effect he has on a teenage girl.





	Not a ladies’ man

On the flight home, Napoleon watched the youthful Sandy laughing with his partner and realised two things: that Sandy was in love and Illya had no idea. Older-brotherly kind, as he had been throughout the mission, he was listening to Sandy and smiling but she was as close as she could be, seated on the arm of his seat, leaning against his shoulder, looking into his face.

<><><> 

Caught up in the mad chase around Europe and the Far East looking for her stepsisters and her father’s formula, she was out of her depth and Illya took her under his wing. He remained at her elbow or with an arm around her, always supportive, always protective. When she sulked and complained, he coaxed her out of it; when she was in danger and frightened, he reassured her. But when Illya himself had been in danger, she had been beside herself until he was safe. And even when she began to touch him and put an arm round him whenever he was beside her, still he didn’t understand that she didn’t see him as an older brother.

<><><> 

What Imogen saw in that policeman heaven only knew. At that bizarre wedding, Illya had seemed rather quiet. Napoleon wondered if it was because Imogen was a little like Marion, who had been gone from his life for two or three years. He noticed Sandy watching his partner with slightly furrowed brow.

“Something bothering you, Sandy?” he asked.

“Oh no, just that Illya looks kind of sad. Why would that be?”

“I expect he’s just tired. He’s not as young as he was,” Napoleon said subversively.

She looked thoughtful at that. “How old is he?”

“Thirty-three.”

“That’s a nice age.”

“Sandy…” he began but Illya had joined them and he stopped.

“We should be on our way,” said Illya. “There’s a plane waiting – Waverly’s car is over there. Coming?”

<><><> 

She came to sit on the arm of his seat in the plane and he turned to look up at her as they talked. She seemed reluctant to let him out of her sight after some of the things that had happened.

“I thought you were going to drown…” she said seriously. “And then you sat up and everything was okay.” She smiled. “The ducks were so funny. Did you know one of them walked on you when you were under the water?”

He smiled too. “No, I was too busy trying _not_ to drown.”

She ended up sitting beside him so he didn’t go to sleep as he usually did on flights. They continued to talk and looked out of the window together. That allowed her to put her head close and even almost touch her cheek to his. Napoleon could do nothing. Illya was bound to realise at some point.

At the airport, they collected their bags and Illya turned to Napoleon. “I’m taking Sandy home, Napoleon, so I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Napoleon looked him in the eye. “Take care, Illya,” he said.

Illya looked surprised. “There’s nothing to worry about now, is there?”

“Until you can see it, I guess not,” he replied obscurely. He watched as they walked away and pulled a face. “I kind of hope you don’t see it,” he said to himself.

<><><> 

“Oh, send him away, you can phone for another cab later,” she said as Illya picked up her bag.

“It’s getting late, Sandy. You ought to be in bed.”

“I don’t want to go to bed. I’m hungry and I bet you are, too. We could order some food.”

Illya was tempted – he too was quite hungry – “All right. If we can make it Chinese,” he said, and took his own bag from the cab and paid the driver. He carried the bags in and went to the phone.

After putting the receiver down, he turned to her and said, “I’ll have to leave after we’ve eaten but I don’t like the thought of you all alone. Is there anyone who could come and stay with you?”

She looked at him wonderingly and said simply, “Couldn’t _you_ stay with me?”

“Me?” He was startled. “I couldn’t possibly,” he said.

“Why not?”

He swallowed. “You’re … I’m… No, not possible, Sandy.”

“Please, Illya. There’s a spare room,” she said cajolingly. “Just for tonight?”

“Sandy…“

He looked at her consideringly. She was very young; she’d been through a lot; and she needed protection. Maybe he _ought_ to. “All right, I’ll stay. Just for tonight,” he said. She was delighted and flung her arms around him. He gently tried to detach himself. “Mind my bruises,” he said and she released him immediately.

“Oh, Illya, I’m sorry. Are they very painful? I have some ointment - can I put it on them for you?”

“No, I’m fine. Thank you, Sandy.” He looked round, hearing the door. “Is that the food delivery? I’ll get it.”

<><><> 

With an arm around her and his fingers on hers, he showed her how to use chopsticks and laughed when she had to get a fork instead. Then they sat with coffee and talked over the events of the last few days. She asked him why he’d looked so sad at the wedding. He glanced at her. “Did I?” he said.

“Yes. I wondered if it was because you wanted to get married someday, too. Do you?”

He was embarrassed and shook his head but didn’t answer.

She looked at his downcast eyes. “Sorry,” she said, “I just wondered,” and was silent for a moment then talked about something else. The moment passed and when the clock struck midnight, they were both surprised.

Sandy stood up. “I didn’t realise it was so late! It’s bedtime,” she said. Illya rose to wish her good night and before he realised what she was doing, she put her hands on his shoulders, kissed him on the lips and slipped her arms around his neck. He turned his head away from her kiss. “Sandy, no, you mustn’t,” he said, stunned and suddenly aware of his own blindness. He had been utterly mistaken in thinking that she saw him as a father figure whenever he had taken her arm or held her hand or held her reassuringly. Napoleon had seen it and had warned him but he hadn’t understood.

She was hurt. “Why? We’re alone. You’ve always had your arm around me … I thought …”

He didn’t dare ask what she’d thought and said quickly, “It was my job to protect you, that’s all.  Not this.”

“It was Napoleon’s job, too, but he didn’t talk to me, or hold me – like you did.”

“He’s a ladies’ man. He knew better – better than I did. I’m sorry if you thought…”

“Oh, Illya … couldn’t _you_ be a ladies’ man?”

What did _that_ mean, he wondered, and looked at her. “Please, let me go.” He could easily have released himself but he didn’t want to injure her.

“Won’t you kiss me?”

“No, Sandy. You don’t know what you’re asking. I don’t seduce young virgins… Hey, don’t cry… I’m sorry… No, I’m not angry… No, I think you’re very sweet, don’t be upset.”

She clung to him and sobbed on his shoulder. He patted her awkwardly and tried to make sense of her disjointed words. “Yes… of course there’ve been other girls,” he said, fatally answering one of her questions. “No! That doesn’t mean … No, I’m not … Sandy, I’m thirty-three years old and you’re not even eighteen.”

She let go of him and hung her head. He pulled his handkerchief from his pocket and, lifting her chin, mopped her cheeks. “It’s all right, it’s a clean one,” he said when she pushed it away. She choked and then giggled a little.

“Oh, you’re so nice,” she said, “but I wish you _were_ a ladies’ man.”

<><><> 

Illya called Napoleon on his communicator after Sandy had gone to bed.

“Where are you, partner?” said Napoleon.

“I’m in the spare room in Sandy’s house. She’s alone and she asked me to stay tonight. I thought I’d let you know… I’m taking great care. Thanks for the warning. Out.”

Napoleon smiled, shook his head, and closed his communicator.

<><><><><>


End file.
